The DJ Rollie D Story

A while back, I had to stop and ask myself if I was the toxic person ruining my own friendships.  In some ways I think I am toxic if we're being completely honest based on my own personal experience with those who have toxic attitudes.  Just to give a few examples, I find myself to be seeking attention more than I should, letting things get stuck inside my head for longer than they need to be (especially my past experiences with people I no longer speak to), and I am almost always looking at the empty side of the glass.  To me, all three of these behaviors speak to the toxicity of me as an individual.  None of these things are ending easily with the mental health problems I unfortunately continue to endure, but I feel that I must do my best to try and hide them as often as I possibly can.  I must be a person who is always happy and smiling and looking at the positive side of the glass.  It seems really easy to do this doesn't it?  Those of you readin...

I was six when one morning at home my family was called to be informed that my aunt had passed away.  All of a sudden, we were heading to Kansas City for about a week to attend her funeral.  The experience was different. I barely knew her even though she had lived with us for about two years.  I guess I just didn't have the firmest grasp on "not coming back" just yet. It was either the day before the funeral or a little before the funeral when we were attending a visitation.  It was my first time seeing an open casket.  My aunt looked so peaceful, almost as if she didn't collapse just a few days prior.  Of course I now know that morticians will dress a body up and put some makeup on before that day, even using a scent sometimes to cover the smell of no longer being present on Earth, but that day was different. I never cried that entire week.  While I was sad that my aunt had passed away, I still felt as if I would see her again someday, and t...